Fatigue
It’s interesting how the human body and mind work. No really it is! When the mind is tired and overwhelmed, it can have very obvious effects on the body! When the body is weary the same can be said inversely. But what’s really interesting about it is those effects can be labeled both good and bad. Seriously! I remember this one month where I worked from 11pm-7am damn near every day, and immediately after work I would go to the gym for another 2 hours. After the gym I would hit the studio to work on some music, then after the studio run errands for my house, go spend time with my girlfriend, and finally head to work to repeat the same exact routine. On average I was getting 7 hours of sleep a week. Bro. It made no sense. I don’t know how I survived. In the beginning, I was just so tired! It felt like I was just running on hopes and dreams, which wasn’t too far from the truth at all, but I had convinced myself that these steps I was taking were absolutely necessary in order for me to reach the goals I set for myself and my family. Now I won’t lie.. My biggest fear at that time was losing all my energy and just dropping to the floor, especially since I had been fasting a little during that period too. But after the second week, I realized that this routine had put me in a place of high functionality, and I was getting more done that month than I had that entire year. It was almost fun. Yeah I didn’t sleep much, but I got work done. Scenes memorized, calories burned, and money being made.
Everyone around me believed that I was doing myself more of a disservice, than being productive, by not getting 8 hours of sleep everyday. That it was an extremely bad thing to push the boundaries of my mind and body, and yet I have to say I disagree. Exercise and dieting requires an absolute fortification of the mind in order to push past physical pain, mental limits, and other distractions. When I would tell other people of the goals I set for myself, and steps towards them I accomplished that week, they would immediately try to convince me to stop “doing what I was doing”. They would suggest the “easier” and alternative ways towards achieving the things that they never achieved themselves. Man. Get outta here with that mess yo. In those moments, when I was unrelenting at working on myself and my craft, I was told that I was not “properly taking care” of myself according to some. But when the physical results began to show, and the industry work became more consistent, everything I did before was no longer a bad thing, but instead labeled as ”good work”. Hah! That’s funny. It’s just an interesting duality I thought I would share today. 😌